Having trouble with my story line/ plot.

by Mitchell
(Oklahoma)

My story is about a sixteen-year-old girl, Roxanne. Her father, John, was a werewolf, but her mother is human and Roxanne did not become a werewolf. My villain in this story is John's best friend, Clayton, who is also a werewolf.


Clayton is the ultimate evil guy who will do whatever it takes to gain power. He is also obsessed with Roxanne even when she was a child. When Roxanne was six-years-old, Clayton had a conversation with John about how John needed to change Roxanne into a werewolf so she won't suffer the rest of her life as a pathetic human being. John, of course, gets offended. Clayton insists that if John will not change his daughter, he will claim her when she is sixteen (A werewolf becomes eligible for a mate at the age of sixteen). John refuses and makes him leave and tells him to stay away from his daughter. Clayton can't stay away from her. He comes back during the night and sneaks into her bedroom. John ends up discovering him and they have an argument that ends up leading to John's death. Clayton, with his pack of werewolves, manages to stage the scene like a car accident. He plans on returning when Roxanne is sixteen to claim what he believes is rightfully his. Roxanne and her mother live the rest of their lives thinking that's how he died, but there are other characters in the story that will help Roxanne discover the truth.

Ten years later, Roxanne turns sixteen and she starts getting the feeling someone is watching and following her. A boy, Seth, becomes a new student at her school. He just happens to be Clayton's son. Clayton had abandoned Seth when he was a child after Clayton killed his mother for disobeying his authority. Seth doesn't even remember what his father looks like. So, Seth has no idea about any of this. He soon finds out that he is extremely attracted to Roxanne and ends up finding out she is his mate.

I have a few different directions this story can go, but I can't decide. Clayton has people working for him everywhere. He is very well informed and plans for Roxanne to be drugged and abducted at a house party. He then will perform a ritual and offer a portion of Roxanne's virgin blood to, Artemis, the goddess of the wolves, to gain power. (But really though, Artemis would not allow that to happen. But Clayton believes otherwise.) Then change Roxanne into a werewolf and impregnate her, all while she is unconscious.

1.) How can I introduce Clayton in the beginning of the story? I have written out a Draft of Clayton being at John's house where the argument occurs and ends up in John's death, but it feels too much like a prologue. Could I change this to the first chapter, then in chapter two start off by saying, TEN YEARS LATER?

2.) Should I make the goal
of the main characters to be to prevent Clayton from abducting her in the first place? I have no idea how I would make it to where these characters even found out what Clayton was up to, to have a heads up to prevent this insane man from ruining her life. OR, should I let this horrible thing happen to her and make her goal to learn to deal with it. Seth and other main characters would do whatever it takes to find out who did this to her and why. If I chose this path, it would create a whole world of problems for so many of my characters. Seth would eventually learn Roxanne is carrying his child. He would also have to make a decision to stay with her and accept it, or not.

3.) I want to add an antagonist, that isn't Clayton. Should I make some of his pack members the antagonists throughout the story?

So many possibilities.

Answer: Of course, I can't tell you how to write your story, but here are some thoughts...

1. I'm going to assume that Roxanne is the main character. In this case, it is a good idea to introduce her to the reader as soon as possible. For many readers, forming a connection to the main character is what gets them into the story. (Consequently, many readers hate prologues.)

All that backstory is something that the reader can find out as Roxanne discovers it. (I would assume her mother kept it a secret until she was old enough to handle it.)

2. You have to decide what the story goal is and what type of story you are writing. Either of the options you suggest could work. It all depends what interests you the most. (A third option: end the book with Roxanne discovering she is pregnant, perhaps with some question re: who the father is, thus setting the stage for the sequel.)

3. It sounds to me like Clayton is the protagonist, pursuing the goal of power. Roxanne is presumably the antagonist who wants to thwart his plans and also the main character who the reader will identify with. However, you could instead make Seth the antagonist, someone who hates his father and wants to rescue Roxanne in order to undermine Clayton's quest for power.

You don't need more than one antagonist, but one thing you might consider is introducing a Contagonist -- a character who impedes other characters (heroes, villains, or others) by throwing obstacles in their way or tempting them to seek short-term pleasure rather than long-term benefits. Contagonists often appear to be minor villains, when it is the main character they are impeding or distracting.

The other archetypal character who sometimes looks like a minor villain is the Skeptic, who basically criticizes other character's plans and beliefs (e.g. Snape in Harry Potter). Skeptics serve a useful function when they draw attention to flaws in the hero's plan, but they can also be annoying.

Comments for Having trouble with my story line/ plot.

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Can I read this story?
by: Anonymous

Mitchell's story sounds really interesting and I'd love to read it. Is it finished and if so where can I read it?

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